I am now more aware and afraid of motherhood.
As the buzz of the alarm clock rings, I repeatedly hit the snooze button. Agitated and incredibly grouchy, I swing the blanket away from me, as it engulfs the small, black and furry body, Fluffy.
Five minutes later and still ms. grumpy. However this time, I force myself to get out of bed, and as soon as the ball of my feet touches the floor– I walk over to the patio. As the sliding door screeches, I yell out, “go pee-pee, go pee-pee fluffy.” As he does his business, I walk over to the kitchen– boil some water and make coffee.
Thank goodness for that because now, I can finally begin the day. Awake. But wait, there’s more!
I have to cook food for Fluffy; rice, chicken broth, and chicken chunks. Then, give him a 30 minute walk. Although it is a nice bit of fresh-air, it is time consuming. I have less time to study or finish homework. Once the walk is done, I have to water and pick the spent blooms for my plants.
By now seven o’clock became nine. Time surely passes by quick. Right as I sat down to have breakfast– time to get up and walk to school!
Phew. The day can finally begin.
What came across my mind most was, if this is the time of my life where I am supposed to relax.. I don’t think so. The responsibilities that I need to manage is actually making me afraid of the REAL and true mother-hood.